in the institution of marriage.
I believe that homosexual couples should also have a possibility of marrying, adopting and raising a child. Maybe it’s true that a child needs both gender parents, but in today’s world there are many families without a father due to a divorce, death, and it’s important to know that many fathers are working in other countries or are by will or circumstances very distant from their families for most of the time. So, what is better? Two loving mothers or two loving fathers or one disappointed mother who has to take care of her children on her own? Maybe I wouldn’t be so much decided on this, if I didn’t have a woman friend, that knew she was a lesbian for most of her life, and to see her get married (or better be joined in a union) with her partner, have a child by donor and they raise that child together with such love, that many “ordinary” couples can’t give to their children. So, should you just give up on your dream of having a family if you are not straight? I sure hope not!
I believe that once you realize you are homosexual, you know you are not going to have an easy life, there are many obstacles waiting for you, and why make it harder for them by distancing them from their dream of marrying and having a family?
It's interesting how many gay couples strive to get married and how it seems that majority straight couples are avoiding it. What are the reasons for fewer weddings in the last period or if people get married - they get married after they already have children (maybe because they realize that you are already bound by children and that it is more convenient to have the same last name). Is it because of the increasing divorce rate, too many examples of marriage gone wrong in the society? Is it mostly because of the high expenses involved in organizing a wedding and low salaries? Are people so against tradition that they think it will not bring them any good or do they mistakenly believe that if you separate while living together for a long time but without being married, that their possessions will not be divided into half and distributed between partners. Well the law says if ... you have been living together for more than 3 years, you are like married in the eyes of the law and your common possessions will be divided in half.
Maybe they are just to egocentric and to involved into themselves that they cannot think about anyone else, but themselves and don’t want to give away their freedom, not even to do the best for their children and decide to give it all with their mother.
As far as my personal experience has thought me, many people, especially men, have a negative outlook on weddings, women are pro wedding in most cases, but don’t want to push their partners into something they don’t want. And many times women are scared that their men will flee if they talk about wedding too much, and they often convince themselves into believing that they don’t want to get married and that it’s better this way. But (thankfully( also many times a woman can over a longer period gently convince her man into a wedding, by little hints, etc. And I am happy to know quite few of those examples of turned-around beliefs in men.
I still believe that most women secretly desire to get married, to be proposed marriage to, to be princesses if only for a day, and believe that a wedding is a strong proof of love and a decision from the heart that a man wants to give it all he’s got to stay with this woman. And a woman wants at least some kind of a proof that will give her comfort in being relaxed having babies with him and raising them. Because a woman is more tided with children, than a man. He can get divorced and date again and be more free, usually not having full custody over children, while a woman has to raise their children practically on her own.
I understand man also. We live in an uncertain era, era of divorces, and their mothers are usually to attached to their sons, because they want him to take care of her (that is frequently with women that don’t have a real intimate and strong connection with their husband). And a man feels suffocated by his mother and now he is projecting his mother onto his woman and has the feeling she will suffocate him also.
So, if the main problem is not recession, but in mothers, like I lately see talking to my single male friends and their mothers, who cannot let them go, we have to start working with mothers from an early age. Maybe that’s my new calling.And tell me honestly- Do you want to get married?
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